Happy Birthday, Lab!

Sunday, March 22, 2015 0 Comments A+ a-

Happy 30th birthday to my best friend, my confidant, my mentor, my challenger, my bully, my biking buddy, my travel mate, my panda bear, my pillow, and of course, my inspiration. You have always been my rock. And even though I don't really like relying on other people, I seem to rely on you so much. Yes, you are spoiling me, so thank you. Haha.

Aside from the 100-peso ukay-ukay jacket that I inadvertently got for your birthday which is really not useful for every day use, and since I got nothing else better to give, here's just a simple post to let you know that I am indeed very thankful for all the things you do. :)

Thank you lab for being there for me, not because you have to but because you want to.

Thank you for your messages that fire up my lazy mornings.

And when you kiss me before we part ways, thank you for I go home with my heart smiling.

Thanks for being a shoulder to cry on during the lowest point of my life.

Thanks for teaching me a new sport. I never thought I would love pingpong as much as I love badminton. I just wish we would have the chance to play again.

Thanks for turning into a sponge whenever I vent out my anger and frustrations about those big or little sh*ts in life. You're the best shock absorber ever as I get through it all smoothly and smiling.

Thanks for always reminding me to keep a healthy lifestyle because we both want to grow old together.

Thanks for being the reason behind my widest and giddiest smile.

Thanks for teaching me how to handle heated arguments. For teaching me how to be humble and take down my pride. You, Sir, are making me a better person.

Thanks for always challenging my mind. Our conversations about logic, the universe, quantum mechanics and all that shit people do not really like to talk about always perk me up even though at some point I don't actually get what you're saying. Physics in general, for example. Haha.

And more than that, thanks for our intimate conversations. You are the only person I have talked to for six hours or more. And it did not only happen once. Would you believe that?!

Thanks for keeping up with me. For being with me in my craziest adventures.

Thanks for being my inspiration and motivation to do the things I have always loved to do.

You are the only one who can bring out the girl in me. I'm not used to it, and it's not cute. But thanks, anyway. Haha.

And above all, thanks for being you. Thanks for being the love of my life. For loving me despite my flaws and my kakulitan. Yes, I will be the nuisance of your existence - constantly biting you, squeezing your flab, and stealing kisses endlessly until it gets so annoying; because I know that no matter how I get so annoying, you will still be there. Haha.

Thank you lab, and happy happy birthday!

I pray for your good health, success, and of course, happiness. And do you think it would be too much to ask if I also ask God if you can spend all of your incoming birthdays with me? Here's for your 30th. I love you, Jan!

The Art of Apathy: Will I Ever Learn It?

Sunday, March 15, 2015 2 Comments A+ a-

How I wish I can.

Just when you feel that everything around is trying to crush your spirit and put you down, you will realize that people who suck the life out of you actually exist. Sometimes it makes me wonder how people can actually take advantage of your kindness just to get what they want and feel no remorse about it.

But then if you have to think about it real hard, such people are, unfortunately, part of your learning and growing up. They allow you to see the nuances of human personalities and it helps you screen people out of your life.

Screening people, however, can be a painful process. Because vulnerability is an essential part of this. You have to be vulnerable to people and allow them to throw whatever they can throw at you if you wish to see the ones who are worth keeping.

Being vulnerable puts you in situations you wish you will never be. And right now, I am in a vulnerable state - sandwiched between doing the right thing and doing the good thing. They're almost the same but have drastically different end results. There's a very subtle line between the two and how I wish I didn't have to learn to see it the hard way. It's hard to keep everything in perfect balance. It's like finding yourself one leg on air, the other on a tightrope.

This is the point when I feel that my choices are not reasonable enough that I have allowed people to dictate my life. I just want to see to it that everybody is happy with my decisions even if it means a part of me gets crushed. But going back to what I said earlier, that's when the picture of people taking advantage of your kindness (or weakness) comes in. They tend to abuse it and they feel they can do anything as they please. And I cannot deny that I am foolish enough to know this but still allow them to do it.

I hate it when I get trapped in situations like this and I know there's no one to blame but me. I feel consumed by pain and regret. Why do they always have to come together? It felt like a stake being driven straight to my heart. I would have easily dodged it, if I chose to. But I guess, I have just let myself be vulnerable this time. What I didn't anticipate is the fatality of the blow that I found myself bathing in my own blood. A mistake I can never undo.

I will just think of this as part of my existence. Whatever I am going through can make me bolder. I am glad I am still holding up. And I am glad that despite how much I abhor the flip side of the society, there are people who are there to catch you before you trip hard and fall onto the ground. There are people who know you and remind who you really are. There are people who will never leave your side and listen to you whine, no matter how shallow or deep the issue is. And I think that's what fuels me in this journey.

I know a lot of you are wondering what the hell I am talking about. Shit just happened and I just wanted to let it all out. So if my thoughts came out confusing, pardon me if I wasted your time for this. But anyway, right now I pray for more patience. Because I just might beat someone to death if I ask for more strength. Haha. Kidding.

I Fell in Love with Dancing... Again.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015 0 Comments A+ a-

This post is a little late because it took me a while to gather up all the resources that I needed for this entry. Pictures, yes. See? That's how bad of a blogger I am. I am too lazy to take pictures of events that I should be blogging about. More so, post-processing and beautifying those pictures with filters and words to make it look more enticing. I wish I have the diligence to do so, especially that I am a graphics designer (sigh). Anyway, enough of the drama, I've got more interesting stories to share than mope about why I fail at such.

Last March 3 2015, I was invited to join a HipHop Fitness Soiree brought to you by My Skin Origins and The Greene Dare. Without second thoughts I scampered around my room and prepared my outfit for the event all the while thinking (and sometimes performing) a few hiphop moves. Surprisingly, I still know how to pop. It's not a big event but yes, I was so excited like I am going to a grand alumni homecoming, except I won't be reuniting with old friends.

Just so you know, it has been a long, long time since the last time I danced in public. Eight years, if my memory serves me right. That doesn't include those times I danced at the malls though, (happened only twice) when Kinect was a new fad at that time and I've got a fair few audience smiling, perhaps because of amusement or mockery as I flail my arms and wiggle my hips - which really didn't matter if I looked like a skinny waddling penguin because I enjoyed it very much. Eight freakin years is a pretty long time. I thought I have lost in touch with my skills and those moves that I am capable of doing. I am as rusty as my bike chain that needs to be lubed.

This HipHop Soiree last Thursday (Mar 5) isn't close to the kind of dancing that I am used to. I sit back, close my eyes and let my mind drift away. I see myself anxiously waiting at the backstage, hair done, make-up on, pacing. Everything goes dark, I move to my place, then a spotlight turns on. I see nothing but the blinding light yet I know hundreds of eyes are watching. I hold my head up in confidence. I breathe in. The music starts, my feet begin to move, and the world disappears.

But it didn't happen the way I am imagining it right now. No limelight, no audience, no screams, no glory. However, it's the closest thing to have my body that's starting to rust out move to the rhythm again. And I am so glad I was there.

Straight is out. Curl is in.

Saturday, March 7, 2015 2 Comments A+ a-

So I decided to get a digital perm. Why? Wala lang. Just for the hell of it. Haha. I haven't really pondered on it. A rash decision as a matter of fact, but not as impulsive as I was before.  I thought that hair looked good. Turns out, it was a disaster. Perhaps it is with the way I carried myself that it never crossed my mind that it was bad until I have these really beautiful curls right now (at least, that's what I think). I have gone through a hair catastrophe and not even a single second have I agonized about it. Which is a good thing. Haha.

Allowing Your Kids to Choose What They Wear

Wednesday, March 4, 2015 0 Comments A+ a-

I know I have already expressed my standpoint regarding talking in public, by public, I mean the internet, about my son. But since I know I will be making a point here, I think it wouldn't hurt if I share a little bit about him. Pictures are, of course, limited even though he's got hundreds of ootd posts that are really worth sharing.

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I am no fashionista. But my son was. Or at least, that's what I made him become. I dressed him in any way I wanted him to without having to hear those solid "NOs" from him; well, he was only a baby after all. Before #ootd posts became mainstream, I got one stylish little man right here.
On Rhett: Cherokee Rock Tee. Converse Chuck Taylor Psychedelic Shoes.

Run For Your Life

Sunday, March 1, 2015 2 Comments A+ a-

The muscles at my lower extremities are pretty sore, I could really use a relaxing massage right now.

But I am not complaining. As my fingers are typing the very words you see at the moment, I try to numb down the soreness with these medicated pain relief patches that I plastered all over my thighs and legs. Doesn't really take away the pain but it's better than nothing. I have been walking around the house, giving off waves of peppermint and I think it smells pretty good. Haha.

You see, I barely survived my 5K run early this morning. No matter, I had fun.