Today is 11.11. Every online and physical store is on a HUUUUGE sale. Tempting, yes. But I wasn't really psyched about it because:

1. I'm broke. And even if I had the money,
2. The internet has been fucked up since Thursday.

So instead of wasting precious bandwidth, loading websites that will only make me a thousand more poorer, I'll blog about last month's National Book Store's Book Binge Bazaar book haul instead.

Even though I go gaga over Queen, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Soundgarden, or Linkin Park, it has never been a secret how much I love boy bands.

I guess you can blame that to the curtain haircuts made famous by Nick Carter back in the 90s. That pretty boy look definitely won too many hearts. But more than the pretty face, they got the phenomenal stage presence, smooth dance moves, cheesy songs, and the voice that definitely made teen girls fall head over heels. And I guess, I have not outgrown that stage until this very day.

I was 12 when I fell in love with these guys. I used to watch them every day on MTV. And even though I claim to be a huge boy band fan, I've never seen one group performed live.

I remember during my freshman year in high school, I saw a batch of seniors who were standing in neat rows under the heat of the sun. They looked cool in their combat boots and fatigue, except, they were more like puppies to me than soldiers. They're pretty good at obeying commands. Sit, roll over, drop and play dead, or whatever the commanding officer tells them to. I watched them every Friday and told myself I've already been potty-trained since 2, I don't need new tricks, and I'm never going to be a trained pup. And the only way to elude the comedy and horror of Preparatory Military Training (PMT) is to be part of a varsity team.

I’m not claiming to be an interesting person but new and seemingly interesting things happened lately. Plus, I need more entries for this blog, so here goes.

"Hey, I got a new badge on my blog."

"Congratulations! You deserve that!"

"Thanks! But I want to add something right there."

There was a pause.

"I want to win a Palanca," I told Jan flat out loud.

He gave me an eager look as he continued to listen to me and my absurd dreams.

I rolled my eyes, gave out a soft sigh, and blurted, "I just do not know how to do it."

You see, I've read this year's winning entries - mostly from established writers, journalist, and columnists - and I certainly do not make the cut.

For the first time in my life, I wished I have the singing voice and be in a musical.

Everybody knows that I am into arts and crafts. I can DIY whatever the hell I want. It's just that... I am lazy. And I don't have a lot of patience for it.

Today, I installed a new cork board and a whiteboard for my workstation - which is pretty boring. And even though I am lazy as can be, I can't have it that way. So to add a little pizzazz to it, I created a pen holder that will hold my whiteboard markers so that I don't have to reach far if I want to write something on it. I saw this somewhere on Pinterest and decided to make one myself.

And bam! My cute DIY pen holder:

Materials you need:
- Cutter
- Scissors
- Empty shampoo bottle
- Art paper
- Glue
- Double-sided foam/mounting tape

I really don't have to make a detailed instruction on how to do it because the crafting part is pretty straightforward and I will leave the creatives up to you. But if you're feeling crafty and looking for something to recycle, I hope this post helped. :)

P.S.
You might also want to check the other pen holder I created last year: DIY Pen Holder

I was known to be a sleeper in class back in college. And when I wasn't sleeping, my classmates would find me scribbling absentmindedly. Half of the pages of my notebook (if I even had one) were filled with doodles and the rest were just clean empty pages.

I might have offended some of my professors back then. Doodling is frowned upon not just in class but also in any occasion that requires attention. What they do not know is that when I am doodling, contrary to what most people think, I am actually focused and interested.

I just want to share what boredom can do to me. And by boredom, I meant, my new ukulele case looks so boring my eyes hurt just by looking at it.

No offense to RJ Guitars. This case is—quality-wise—excellent. I embrace simplicity but this is just too bland for my taste. So to prettify it up a little bit, I decided to do a little tattoo on the pockets. And the next thing I know, the whole thing's already covered with doodles.

It took me more or less two hours to finish it and I absolutely LOVE it!

I wish one day I'd be able to paint one of these walls...

I have over 50 drafts to date and not one of them is worth publishing anymore. Panis na kasi.

I don't know if I should feel bad about that or the fact that I got more stories still waiting to be written (cue: I Can Wait Forever by Air Supply). The blogging wells could run dry sometimes and I have a few things to blame. One, I am busy. And by busy, I mean, I do a lot of things that has nothing to do with productivity. Two, I have never failed at procrastinating. Three, blogging on a mobile device is absolutely frustrating.

But none of that really matters. No one's holding somebody a hostage to get me to write. So it's not really a big deal. Heck, the word deal should not even be brought up here. On the other hand, I feel like I am the one being taken hostage by this blog and it is demanding me to write something - and it does not matter if it is sensible or not. Damn you, blog. Why don't you just leave me alone?!

I should have written this post the moment I knew this blog won a major award in Bloggys 2015. A few bloggers have published a word of thanks on the same date after bagging their awards and I could have done it too knowing I wasn't actually doing anything the night they announced the winners. But from the moment Jan broke the news to me, I fell short for words. I had to wait a day or two for the elating feeling to subside because my vocabulary became limited to "oh", "my", and "gosh", and only in that particular order.

Honestly, I do not know what to say anymore. I believe I have already said everything before - from the moment I got nominated to the time I made it to the voting stage and when I finally became one of the finalists. I never thought I'd have to write another post for this. I don't want to make it sound like I'm giving a speech in The Oscars (albeit the feeling might be pretty much the same thing), so I'll keep this short and simple. This may sound like a broken record, but I'm going to say it again anyway...THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I guess, no matter how many Thank Yous I write, it will never be enough to express how grateful I am to every single one of you reading my blog, my family and friends who never get tired of clicking the links I shamelessly feed on Facebook, and to Jan who always believes in me. You fuel my desire to write, be better, and make a difference. I know more blogs deserve your time than mine, that's why I am truly honored. Again, thank you!

Life Is So Full of Tae won Best Personal/Diary Blog in #Bloggys2015 Philippine Blogging Awards. So as promised, this is yours truly twerking it (even) better than Miley:

Finally found a way to post a "video" of me twerking without giving you nightmares. I hope you guys didn't think I won just because I said I'd do a twerking vid if I win, did you? Haha.

First of all, I really don't know what to say.

I am still waiting for my brain to fully process my thoughts and turn them into words. Because right now, my mind's clouded with emotions that the words just might not come out right [insert inaudible words, shriek, and mild and stifled sobs here]. And I also suspect ninjas have been cutting onions in front of me again.

But it's not what you think it is. No drama, I promise. Earlier today, I was in for a huge surprise because.... drumroll please...

When I started blogging, I was only a college student who thought life was so full of shit (although I still think it is) that I blogged about how shitty and unfair life can get after stepping on a bubble gum with your brand new shoes. Half of the time I was ranting. And half of it, I was trying to make myself look good. My voice was soft, quiet, and dampened back then. I wasn't comfortable being myself. So I wrote only of the things I wanted the people to read because I was ashamed and afraid. I was afraid of rejection. I was afraid that people I don't even know would hate me. I was afraid that they may see me less of a person by my choice of words. I was careful with anything I wrote that hitting the publish button was a challenge.

Years passed and life became shittier than it was. It became so murky that I couldn't help but type my words to let the fog out and have some sense of clarity. It was hard for me to open up. Questions began to surface when I started showing the profound and "less edited" version of me. Questions that begin with what if. It's pretty amazing how the simple and innocent words What and If - which are perfectly harmless on their own - can become really catastrophic when combined. It's like a bomb that when dropped would make me go back scampering inside my shell. What if people will judge me for this? What if they'll think I'm like this or that? What if it's not good enough? It was a war between me and my inhibitions. A struggle to survive the pangs of truth.

I was never made for popularity contests. I cringe at the attention. Although I was popular on my own before. I was top of the class batch for the number of absences, lates, and incident reports made. But other than that, I am unknown to many. Never won or even joined a contest that decides the winner through voting. My charms, or lack thereof, is not enough to win a vote or two.

But sometimes the inevitable happens that I am forced to compete. So here I am, asking for two minutes of your time to vote for my blog at Bloggys 2015 - Philippine Blogging Awards. Because surprisingly, my blog has made it to the shortlist of the Philippine's most prestigious blogging awards in search of the country's finest bloggers.

Not that I'm aiming to win the "People's Choice" award here. I know my chances are way too slim to nothing. Who am I, anyway? I am barely visible in the blogosphere. A crack on the sidewalk in the avenue of stars. Yadda yadda. Yet, despite being wala lang, I don't want to be the first from the bottom either. Ayaw ko namang maging kulelat no. I'd probably melt in shame if I only get 4 votes by default (one coming from me, my boyfriend, and my mom and dad). Although I don't think I'd even know how many votes I'll get. But still. Kaya eto kakapalan ko na mukha ko.

So, if you could...

Can you say NO to this?

I haven't done so much of this, and I know need a lot of practice now. I seemed to be satisfied with a botched artwork. Ugh. But hey, my friends loved it! :)

#TheThingsIDoWhenInternetIsDown

I went 3 days without the internet. Not that I did it on purpose. It's the crappy service I get from my ISP.

I just saw myself reacting poorly to the situation by getting agitated by, excuse my word, inutile customer service representatives who cannot help solve internet problems brought about by my ISP's poor quality service.

But then I realized I may have lost my internet connection, but I gained something. TIME. A lot of it. I gained a few extra hours a day. Not to mention, I've added a few more hours of sleep which internet has robbed me off since forever. But that doesn't mean I won't lash out for the frustration of not having a decent internet connection. I didn't pay hard-earned money for crap. 

This is an old, old idea.

Unoriginal.

But I cannot think of a better way to fuse my love for writing and drawing than to create blog posts devoted to both. Hence, the GuLat Project. Gulat is a Filipino word that means shock or surprise. But I've also coined this from two words, Guhit (draw) and Sulat (write) - which are apparently the things that I absolutely love to do.

As you can see, I've been including doodles in my entries lately and this is what I plan to do on my succeeding posts. I got this idea from Doodlemum - a blog that I've been following for a long time. What separates her art from mine is that her doodles are waaaaaay amazing while mine are just mere stick figures you wouldn't have to second guess if they were drawn by a five-year-old. But, oh well.

I love to write but I never really wanted to be a writer. Not that I consider myself to be one. As a matter of fact, I didn't like my English classes back in high school and college. I have even failed English (literature) once. My lack of interest in the English Language and Literature, however, unexpectedly warranted me to end up writing stuff for a living.

Well, that's what I did a long time ago and I tried to do the same thing recently. I was under the impression that I can make writing pay the bills again. Before I glued my butt to the swivel chair to write a 1000-word essay, I was so pumped up by the mere fact that I really do love writing. I can write more than a thousand word blog post in an hour or so.

This should be easy.

I've never heard of Bloggys until quite recently when I received an email notifying me being a nominee of Bloggys 2015 - the Philippine's premiere blogging event.